Musicals inspired by films
Just imagine if some of the greatest films were re-made into musicals? Would it not be great to see Planet of the Apes, Robocop and Scarface suffer this treatment!
Planet of the Apes
Planet of the Apes includes "Dr Zeus you bloody baboon", "We blew it up!", "Get your hands off me you damm dirty ape", "You cut up his brain", "I name you Nova" and "Shit, Brent you look just like me!"
Dr Zeus you bloody baboon - Is a very dramatic sequence as Taylor wittingly insults the Dr in front of his friends!
We blew it up! - Features a nuclear weapon and the Statue of Liberty buried in sand, Talyor wails about the fate of the human race as he buries himself in sand?!
Get your hands off me you damm dirty ape - A strange section where Taylor is allowed to jump around and scream in the Ape town.
You cut up his brain- Zombiefied Landon dances like a wooden mannequin.
I name you Nova - A romantic scene where Taylor names the unknown lady.
Shit, Brent you look just like me! - The shock of seing your doppleganger is realised as Brent and Taylor comment on the jeopardy
Robocop
Robocop would feature, "ooo does it hurt", "I'm a Robot", "You are going to be one bad mother fucker" and "I work for Dick Jones, Dick Jones!"
ooo does it hurt - is done in the style of Bohemian Rhapsody
Bad guy - "oooo does it hurt!"
Murphey - "Yes it hurts....it hurts like helll...ow my arm!"
I'm a Robot - is a solo sad song for Murphey, it is filled with a lot of passion and would feature the descrution of many TV screens.
You are going to be one bad mother fucker - is done in the style of Greece lightening, this is the scene where they are making Robocop, so they are swinging his robotic limbs around. Bob takes the lead for that song. It ends with Robo sitting in the chair.
"Target, target follow! aaah ahhhhhhhh....playback...ahhhhh"
I work for Dick Jones, Dick Jones! - involves Clarence getting thrown through several windows. He reveals many plot points that lead to Dick Jone's corrupt system. Clarence will be seen waving his arms and jumping sideways as he pleads for his life.
Scarface
Scarface would feature many great songs like "Say Hello to my little friend", "She not for you" and "How I am goin' get a scar by eating pussy", "Don't mess with me you monkey!"
Say Hello to my little friend will be a dangerous mix of rock and pop. Tony Montana will make his last stand as he introduces the bad guys to his little friend.
Tony - "Say Hello to my little friend"
Bad Guy 1 - "hello little friend"
Bad Guy 2 - "hello little friend"
Bad Guy 3 - "hello"
Bad Guy 4 - "hello"
She not for you - will include many cigars. All the characters in the scene will be smoking them, this scene reveals the intentions of Manny towards Gina.
Manny - "But I love her..."
Tony - "Shhhhheeeee not for you.... not for you!"
Manny - "But we are family..."
Tony - "not fooorrr you!"
How I am goin' get a scar by eating pussy - A very dramatic over the top scene which will feature the questioning cops.
Don't mess with me you monkey! - You just should not mess with the man and that is what Tony has done. Now he will have to pay!
You forgot a Westside Story face off between the Marines and the Aliens. Lots of finger clicking.
Predator the musical, featuring such songs as:
"I'm a godamned sexual tyrannosaurus" sung by Jessie Ventura in the style of "Everone has aids" from Team America.
"You're one ugly motherfucker" - This is a duet between Arnie and the Predator.
"jees you got a big pussy, jees you got a big pussy" - A love song about a commondo and his girlfriend.
Die Hard the musical:
"Who said we were terrorists" - Sung by Hans Gurber, this is a German folk song about his goals in life and what he wants to do with the money.
"Yippie kay-yay Motherfucker" - Sung by Bruce in the style of "Uncle Fucker". A slower and sadder version of this could be sung when he is in the bathroom and his feet are cut up.
"The quarterback is Toast!" - A fast paced number with the terrorists and police fighting each other through the medium of dance.
Terminator and Aliens
Terminator
Terminator would compose of a heavy metal and rock mix. "I'll be back", "Oh shit she's going to kill Dyson" and "Why is Woofie barking?"
Aliens
Aliens hosts "I got a chest burster", "Ash is a god damm robot" and "Vasquez you ever been mistaken for a man?"
Wax On Wax Off - Mr Miyagi teahces Daniel the true art in this upbeat number.
Fear Does Not Exist In This Dojo Does It! - Kresse gets his boogie on with the Cobra Kai as he tells them the true nature of karate.
No Mercy! - Daniel fights for his life againt the no mercy motto of the Cobra Kai!
Jurassic Park
Weclome to Jurassic Park - John Hammond REALLY welcomes his guests.
I Can't Get Jurassic Park Back Online! - This pannicy number is sung by Samuel L Jackson as he tries to convince John Hammond the park is fucked!
Don't Move! - A jolly number where Alan dances behind the T Rexes back trying to escape and then freezes every time he sings "Don't Move!", kinda like the song "You Can't Touch This", but with oh my god that guy got eaten on the toilet time, instead of hammer time.
The Pirates Don't Eat the Tourists - Malcom tries to lighten the mood by coming up with this danceflloor filler in the bunker.
Green Jelly - The kids are eating jelly, the raptors are chasing them, but god damn it that Green Jelly tastes good!
T Rex The Last Dinsoaur He's Our Friend And a Whole Lot More - The crew sing this as the T Rex sweeps in at the end of the movie and saves the day!
Tremors
Well...Shit - Kevin Bacon sums up the situation when they dsocver the first victim of the graboids!
No Way These Are Local Boys! - A country music style song as Ward, Bacon and that woman no one ever remembers are sitting on a rock wondering where the hell they come from.
Broke In The Wrong God Damn Rec Room Didn't You, You Son Of A Bitch! - Burt has a good time with this joyful celebration number!
Up On The Roof - The cast cover this classic with new lyrics especially adapted for the movie:
"When these graboids are getting me down, there's only one place I'll go if I don't wanna die....Up oonnnn the roof!"
I Wouldn't Give You A Gun If It Was World War Three - A comedy number by Burt as he tells the dumb kid there's no way he's getting a weapon.
Throw The Bomb! - An operatic number between Ward, Bacon and that girl I still can't remember the name of, as they fight over whether to throw the last bomb or not!
Rambo - First Blood Part II
Just Photo's - Rambo begs to blow stuff up in this catchy number where his new boss insists he just take photos!
I'm...Expendable - Rambo bears his heart and soul to his new Vietnamese love interest!
What Do You Buy A Warrior Who Has A Bazooka! - Rambo's vietnamenese love interest does this joyful little slush number in the style of Olivia Newton John!
Fuck You - Rambo sings this cheesy pop record to hsi interrogaters as they torture him by electrocution.
Murdock... I'm coming to get you! - A real rock number as Rambo grips the microphone and bursts in to rock karaoke as he blasts down the mike that hes coming to get Murdock!
Mission... Accomplished - Rambo celebrates the good times by tracking down Murdock and telling him how much of an asshole he thinks he is.
Pulp Fiction
"Knocking off Liquerstores" A song from Ringo to Yolanda about the dangers of robbing gas stations and ABC stores.
"The Little differences" A tune from Vincent Vega to Jules Winnfield about the differences of America and Europe.
"The Holiest of Holies" A song about foot massages and a Somoan man.
"Does He Look Like a Bitch?" A tune about Marcellus Wallace.
"You My Nigga?" A number From Marcellus to Butch about taking a fall.
"Don't Jimmy me Jules" An angry number about storing dead black people.
"Mushroom Cloud Pushin'" A song from Jules to Vincent about pushing buttons.
There are others, that is just the first of two acts.
We need more science fiction musicals. If I was given the rights to Star Trek I would be sure to release some great sound tracks.
Backed up by an electric guitar we would have...
"I am Luctus of Borg" - Picard gets borgorized and goes crazy. He tries to take over the Enterprise again chanting his new name.
"There are 4 lights" - In this scene Picard gets captured and tourtured.
"You're suffering from a Vulcan Mind Meld, Doctor." - Kirk tries to explain to McCoy just what has happened.
"What does God need with a Starship?" - Kirk questions the almighty for his I.D. , even God explains the situation. Done in a West Side Story "Officer Grumpsky" way.
"You broke your little ships." - Picard destroys thousands of model star ships. Lilly tries her best to calm him down.
"Arms wide at Tunagra" - Picard attempts to learn the language of a new race. He fails misserably.
If we can not obtain the rights to Star Trek, just going to have to rip it off instead and do a Galaxy Quest thing. In that case we have some more titles to work with.
"I'm the Captain" - The Commander assumes control when an alien race kills the Captain.
"Get me some Tea, hot" - The new Captain arrogantly orders the computer around to get him his beverages.
"I got to Mr." - This is a split screen action sequence, between the new don Captain facing the uba hard borg like queen. The chorus is composed of laser blasts and many unknown ensigns and borg like drones dying off. You should think of it as a mixture between Starship Troopers and Zoolander's walk on stage dance.
A musical version of The Crow, would also prove to be entertaining...
It would feature the following songs!
"It can't rain all the time."
"You've got me dead bang."
"Quick impression for you: Caw! Caw! Bang! Fuck, I'm dead!"
"I feel like a little worm on a big fucking hook."
"This is the really real world, and there ain't no comin' back. "
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